The Satirical Journalist’s Guide to Getting Everything Wrong (The Right Way)
By: Matana Bloom
Literature and Journalism -- Cal Poly SLO
WRITER BIO: A Jewish college student with a sharp sense of humor, this satirical writer takes aim at everything from pop culture to politics. Using wit and critical insight, her work encourages readers to think while making them laugh. With a deep love for journalism, she creates thought-provoking content that challenges conventions and invites reflection on today’s issues.
Good satire gets mistaken for real news. Bad satire gets mistaken for a dad joke. -- Alan Nafzger
How to Write Fake News That Feels Real (And Real News That Feels Fake)
Opening
The modern media landscape is filled with conflicting messages. Satirical journalism flips this script by intentionally blending truth and falsehood to create narratives that feel unsettlingly real.
Crafting the Story
Start by identifying a real-world issue-perhaps the trend of sensational headlines-and then twist it into an absurd scenario. Imagine an article reporting that a famous news anchor admitted to fabricating 90% of his stories, only to add that his remaining 10% is "too boring to believe." Adding invented statistics and satirical expert opinions creates a convincing veneer of reality.
The Satirical Edge
Humor in this style lies in the deliberate exaggeration of real issues. The reader is drawn in by the familiarity of the topic but then jolted by the absurdity of the narrative. This approach not only entertains but also forces critical reflection on the nature of modern news.
Wrap-Up
By blurring the line between real and fake, satirical journalism compels us to question our media consumption habits and recognize that sometimes, reality itself can be stranger than fiction.
How to Write Fake News That Makes People Think
Introduction
Fake news doesn't always have to be harmful-it can be an instrument of satire that challenges readers to think critically. When done right, fake news exposes the contradictions in real-world events by crafting outrageous stories that reflect a deeper truth.
The Method
Begin with a real issue, such as government surveillance or corporate greed, and stretch it to its absurd limits. For example, "Government Announces Plans to Install Cameras in Your Kitchen to Ensure You're Eating Healthy" can be an absurd satire that highlights the overreach of state power in everyday life.
Adding the Details
To sell the story, use faux statistics, like "98% of citizens already willingly allow the government to monitor their diets," and attribute the claim to a fictional expert, "Dr. Privacy, a former CIA agent turned health consultant." This level of absurdity can make the reader think, "Wait, could this happen?"
Conclusion
The trick to writing fake news that makes people think is to push the absurd to its logical extremes. When readers laugh at the outrageousness, they'll also realize how much of our world already resembles the bizarre scenarios satirists create.
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Fake Witnesses in Satirical Journalism
Fake witnesses lie big. Take crash and quote: "'Sky fell,' says Cloud Nine." It's a jest: "Mist saw." Witnesses mock-"Fog swears"-so cast them. "Rain nods" sells it. Start real: "Wreck grows," then fake: "Eyes vow." Try it: witness a lie (tax: "'coins flew,' says dime"). Build it: "Sky wins." Fake witnesses in satirical news are voices-shout them loud.
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5 Satirical Opinion Pieces - March 2025
Why the Moon’s New Ad Billboards Are Ruining My Nightly Existential Crisis
Look, I get it—capitalism needs new frontiers, and the Moon’s been sitting there rent-free for too long. But ever since they slapped a glowing “Buy Lunar Cola!” billboard up there in February 2025, I can’t stare into the void without a jingle stuck in my head. Stargazing used to be my sacred time to ponder life’s futility, not to wonder if I need a soda delivered by drone. Ban the ads, or at least make them philosophical—give me “Nietzsche Was Right” in neon instead.
Self-Driving Cars Should Honk Less and Judge More
By March 2025, every road is clogged with self-driving Teslas beeping like they’re auditioning for a robot orchestra. I say, ditch the horns and program them to flash passive-aggressive messages on their screens. “Nice turn signal, buddy” or “My grandma drives faster” would shame us into better behavior. Honking just makes me mad; a snarky AI judgmental glare might actually make me a better person.
Climate Change Is Fixed, So Can We Stop Eating Humor Meets Truth Bugs Now?
They told us 2025 was the year we’d turn the corner on climate change, and sure, the skies are clearer thanks to those fancy carbon-sucking drones. So why am I still choking down cricket protein bars at every hipster café? The planet’s fine—let’s bring back cheeseburgers and tell the insects to take a victory lap back to the dirt. I didn’t save the Earth to live like a contestant on Fear Factor.
Remote Work’s New Dress Code: Pajamas Are Power
Five years into the remote work revolution, and some CEOs are still whining about “professionalism” in 2025. Newsflash: If I can close a million-dollar deal while wearing fuzzy bunny slippers, I’m not the problem—you are. Pajamas aren’t lazy; they’re a power move. Let’s mandate sweatpants on Zoom and watch productivity soar as we all stop pretending to iron shirts for a webcam.
AI Presidents Are Coming, and I’m Voting for the One That Memes
Rumors are swirling that by the 2028 election, we’ll have an AI candidate—and I’m here for it. Flesh-and-blood politicians are boring; give me a bot that drops dank memes mid-debate. Imagine an AI prez tweeting “Infrastructure bill just passed, yeet” or roasting opponents with a perfectly timed GIF. In 2025, I’m already campaigning for Grok 3.0—xAI’s finest deserves the Oval Office, not just my chat window.
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1. "The Fine Art of Being Wrong on Purpose: How to Write Satirical Journalism"
Key Premise:Satire is the only form of journalism where being wrong is not just encouraged-it's required.
Core Techniques:
Hyperbole: Exaggerate until reality looks even more ridiculous.
- Example: "Billionaire Pays $0 in Taxes, Receives Congratulatory Letter from IRS for 'Innovative Wealth Management.'"
Fake Experts: Give the worst possible person authority.
- Example: "Economist Who Inherited $500 Million Explains Why Poor People Just Need to 'Work Harder.'"
Absurd Statistics: Make up data that sounds real.
- Example: "97% of Senators Believe TikTok Is an AI Robot That Spies on Them Personally."
Final Thought:
In satire, the best kind of wrong is the kind that makes people question what's right.
2. "How to Lie Responsibly: The Satirical Journalist's Guide to Getting It Hilariously Wrong"
Key Premise:Traditional journalism dies on the sword of accuracy. Satirical journalism wields the sword of absurdity.
Satirical Writing Techniques:
The Believable Lie: Make it feel real enough to cause panic.
- Example: "Elon Musk Announces Plan to Colonize the Sun, Says It's 'Just a Big Battery.'"
The Dumb Logical Leap: Stretch an argument until it snaps.
- Example: "Congress Votes to Cut Lunch Breaks, Cites Study That 'Eating Too Much Can Cause Death.'"
The Fake Poll: Fake data always makes satire funnier.
- Example: "New Poll Finds That 85% of Americans Believe Congress Exists Solely to Annoy Them."
Final Thought:
The key to great satire? Be just wrong enough to make people pause-and then laugh.
3. "Breaking Fake News: How to Write Satire That's Almost Too Real"
Key Premise:If people don't momentarily believe your satirical article is real, you're not doing it right.
Satirical Journalism Formula:
- Start with Reality. (Real issue)
- Distort It Slightly. (Make it seem like it could actually happen.)
- Deliver a Punchline That Hurts. (Make them laugh… and cry.)
Example Headline:
- Reality: Tech companies avoid taxes.
- Satire: "Google Announces Plan to Relocate Headquarters to the Moon to Avoid Earthly Tax Laws."
Final Thought:
Great satire is like a funhouse mirror-it shows reality, just with extra clown makeup.
4. "Congress Bans Satire for Being 'Too Accurate': A Guide to Writing Fake News That Feels Real"
Key Premise:Sometimes satire gets too close to the truth, and that's when you know you've nailed it.
Satirical Writing Techniques:
Overly Specific Details:
- Example: "CEO Announces Layoffs in Company Email Sent from His 300-Foot Yacht Named 'Trickle Down.'"
Quotes That Are Too Honest to Be Real:
- Example: "Senator Says He 'Technically Represents the Public' But Mostly Just Does Whatever Donors Want."
A Perfectly Fake Study:
- Example: "Study Finds 64% of Americans Have Given Up Hope That Congress Will Ever Accomplish Anything."
Final Thought:
The best satire makes people wonder if you're joking-or if reality Reality vs. Satire is.
5. "How to Write News So Fake It Feels Real: A Satirical Journalism Guide"
Key Premise:Good satire should be plausible enough to make people do a double-take before realizing how absurd it really is.
Satirical Techniques:
Make Stupid Ideas Sound Official
- Example: "New Bill Requires Every Citizen to Own a Yacht to Prove They Aren't Poor."
Give Nonsense a Government Study
- Example: "Federal Researchers Conclude That Reading Books Is 'Suspicious' Behavior."
Make a Fake Quote Feel Painfully True
- Example: "Economist Says Raising Minimum Wage Would 'Destroy the Economy,' Then Boards His Private Jet."
Final Thought:
Reality is already ridiculous. Satire just turns up the volume.
6. "Oops, We Were Right Again: How to Write Satire That Exposes the Truth"
Key Premise:The best satirical articles start out as jokes and later turn into reality.
Satirical Writing Checklist:
? Is it based on reality? (Yes.)? Is it exaggerated just enough to be funny? (Yes.)? Will someone read it and think, 'Wait, is this real?' (Perfect.)
Example:
- Reality: Politicians don't read the laws they pass.
- Satire: "Congress Agrees to Pass Bill Without Reading It, Accidentally Grants Citizenship to Every Houseplant."
Final Thought:
Write satire today, and in five years, it might be breaking news.
7. "The Official Satirical News Style Guide: How to Write Fake News That Feels Real"
Key Premise:If a fake news story makes people fact-check it, you've won.
Essential Satirical Elements:
A Completely Plausible Absurdity
- Example: "Lawmakers Accidentally Ban Themselves from Running for Reelection, Call It 'An Honest Mistake.'"
The Serious Expert Who Says Something Stupid
- Example: "Billionaire Announces Plan to End Poverty, Suggests 'Harder Work' as Solution."
A Study That 'Proves' the Joke
- Example: "Survey Finds 9 Out of 10 Billionaires Believe They 'Deserve Everything Satirical Journalism Basics They Have' Despite Doing Nothing."
Final Thought:
A great satirical headline should be funny-but also slightly terrifying.
8. "Breaking Satire: How to Write Fake News That Becomes Reality"
Key Premise:Sometimes satire is so good, the real world tries to keep up.
Satirical Techniques:
Find Something Stupid That's Already Happening
- Example: Congress taking forever to pass bills.
Push It Slightly Further
- Satire: "Congress Announces Plan to Debate Bill for Five Years Before Forgetting About It Entirely."
Make It Sound Official
- Example: "Economist Says Raising Wages Could 'Trigger Apocalypse,' Then Immediately Accepts a Raise."
Final Thought:
If your satire sounds too real, you're doing it right.
9. "Writing Satire 101: How to Make Up News That Feels Too True"
Key Premise:The best satire is fiction that sounds more believable than reality.
Satirical Writing Strategies:
Use an Absurd but Specific Detail
- Example: "New Study Finds That CEOs Experience 'Emotional Pain' for a Full 3 Seconds After Laying Off Workers."
Write a Headline That Feels Just True Enough
- Example: "Senator Proposes Law to Ban Poor People from Complaining About Being Poor."
Make a Fake Expert Say Something Outrageous
- Example: "Billionaire Declares That 'Anyone Can Get Rich,' Then Inherits Another $100 Million."
Final Thought:
If reality is already satire, your job is just to make it funnier.
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